Reflecting on University

I graduated from American University with a bachelor's degree in literature this summer. The past three years of my undergraduate career were beyond challenging but I feel relieved and proud to have gotten through it. I was always hesitant to share with others at my school, both peers and professors, about the struggles that I was going through in my personal life, but when I did, I found so much support and understanding. Going through college through a pandemic lockdown while also dealing with chronic illness, helping care for family members with dementia, and also suffering from grief due to losing six loved ones in a period of less than two years was overwhelming. I had my fair share of tears and frustration, but I made it through with the help of lots of therapy and creative outlets like my art and crocheting.

I finished university with a cumulative GPA of a 3.8. I understand that grades and GPAs do not determine anyone's full self-worth, but I stand behind it as a testament of my hard work. I put so much effort into class participation, assignments, and presentations and I think that my GPA reflects that. Especially since my performance as a student when I was younger was never that high, but this time around I was dedicated to school and pursuing a better life for myself. I cared about achieving highly at American University.

Not only did my academic performance matter to me, but I really valued my learning and creativity in college, and I made it a priority to have fun throughout the entire process. I wrote papers about my personal interest in medicinal leeches, comparative essays on how zombie films outlined pandemic outbreak narratives in American popular culture, and several horror sonnets. I took a class about making art in code and I made a medieval-style triptych advocating for the ethical treatment of lab rats. Of course, the highlight of it all was working with my dear mentor, Rhonda Zimlich, as I wrote my gothic horror vampire novel which I compressed into a short story for my senior capstone. All the writing I got to experiment with was a treat.

I was able to explore every genre of literature I could wish to discover and had the joy of working with many skilled authors and editors throughout the whole experience. When I first enrolled at American University, I had no self-confidence whatsoever and I was terrified to take on such a huge commitment. I honestly was not sure if I would be adequate enough as a writer or student to make it through. But my self-determination outshined my low self-esteem, and I powered through everything socially and academically to follow my dreams and complete my goals. Now I can say I've been professionally published, I have been accepted into multiple MFA programs (though I am not sure if I am going to pursue this avenue just yet), and that I am done with my undergraduate career.

I am so thankful to my mom for being my greatest supporter throughout the past few years. She has seen the difficulties I've been through and encouraged me to do my best and stay true to myself through everything. I am also thankful for my incredible professors who taught me so many valuable skills and lessons through their classes and mentorships that I will always cherish. I am thankful for the great friendships I've made, the support from family I've received, and the self-love that I've learned to give myself along the way.

As for the next steps in my career I am continuing to diligently look for a job in my field, preferably in editing, publishing, or writing in some capacity. For now, I am holding down a full-time retail job I hope to stay in only temporarily and I am continuing to work on my vampire novel and create art in my free time.

Cheers to a brighter and bookish future!

~Nikolai Sergei Razumov